Now that it’s December, we are deep in the holiday season. Starbucks
is selling its holiday beverages, outdoor shopping centers have put up
their big trees, the Christmas lights have gone up on homes, fires have
started crackling, and hot cocoa has been brewing.
The holidays can bring all kinds of warm, fuzzy feelings for people, but
if you’re a parent going through a
divorce, suddenly you’re thinking about how you’re going to share
or divide the holidays with your soon-to-be-former spouse – not
necessarily a “warm” thought for most people. In this article,
we explain how divorcing parents usually address
child custody during the holiday season.
Option #1: Spend Them Together
Do you get along well with your ex? If you have a reasonably good relationship
with him or her, you have the option of spending the holidays together
as one big happy family. And what if significant others enter the picture?
You don’t have to exclude them. Instead, invite them along and make
them feel welcome at the family gatherings.
Option #2: Alternate Holidays
Spending the holidays with one’s ex is not everyone’s cup of
tea. Perhaps you can’t stand your ex or perhaps there’s a
lot of bad blood and you simply aren’t comfortable being in the
same room together. If for any reason you do not want to spend the holidays
together with the kids, another option is to alternate holidays and rotate
them each year.
Advice for High-Conflict Families
If you have a high-conflict family, our advice is to create a very detailed
Parenting Plan that addresses each holiday and how you’re going to handle it. When
the holiday arrives, stick to whatever was outlined in the Parenting Plan
and don’t deviate from it. As time goes by, you and your ex will
slowly be able to re-establish trust and hopefully reach a more flexible
arrangement. This usually happens as time heals and the dust settles from
Should I Stay Off Social Media During Divorce?
To file for divorce,
contact Claery & Hammond, LLP for a free consultation.